Fooled you, fooled you!

I did it, bitches!

I. Did. It.

Ran 13.1 miles (ok, walked some of it too).

The ugly stats:

Final time of 3:02:31 (I'm taking off 10 minutes that I had to wait for a potty in Windsor)

Overall place: 4583 out of 11058 (not dead last!)
Gender place: 2500 out of 5560 (still not dead last!)

The experience was INCREDIBLE! I will do that again next year, you bet. The highlights:

1) Standing in a crowded corral sharing my nervous feelings with a younger runner on her first Half as well;

2) The smell of fresh tortillas cooking as I ran through Mexican Town;

3) Running across the Ambassador Bridge as the sun was coming up over the horizon;

4) Having a guy yelling "Welcome to Canada! Tim Horton's is around the corner!" as I came to the other side of the bridge;

5) Running the first half of the marathon with NO WALK BREAKS. My first break was the aforementioned potty break around the halfway point in Windsor;

6) The guy dressed as Mr. Incredible in the full costume running near me;

7) Running through the tunnel. Yeah, it was like running through a locker room after football practice, but the downhill run to the center of the tunnel was much needed;

8) Seeing Mr. Gravity at 12.5 miles. I had to walk miles 10-12 due to my hip flexor cramping up, but as soon as I saw him I had the strenth to run to him;

9) Mr. Gravity took my hand and walked with me for half a mile towards the finish;

10) Turning the corner and seeing that finish line. I ran strong for that last .3 miles and gave a fist pump as I crossed the finish line!

The entire experience was one I will never forget. It will always be my first time, and now I have something to beat next year. Oh running....I love you again!

-K

But do you floss?

Michigan State Police are trying to obtain leads on the perpetrators of a prank at Tawas Area High School. Someone stuck approximately 5,000 toothpicks into the football field. They had to move tonight's game to the opposing team's field while the groundskeepers use a roller to "mow" them down. Brava, pranksters...brava! And don't forget to floss!

-K

Do the Iranians love their children too?

Mr. Gravity and I were watching the evening news this week when a story about Putin visiting the Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad came on. There was much speculation about WHY. Why Putin was shaking hands with the Iron-Fisted Iranian. And by doing so, causing such controversy with the Western world. As with all political situations, just look for the money...

1) Iran is an oil rich country. Russia, increasingly and slowly, is not. What oil reserves they do have are becoming virtually inaccessible and the reserves that remain untapped can be done so only at great expense. And since Russia is not a great innovator (i.e. researching oil alternatives), they need to align with a country that will pay them back for the support in a sticky political time. That is why they aren't best friends with China...both countries need the same things and can't get them from each other.

2) Start a new Cold War. The Cold War made Russia rich. The Cold War created Russian jobs. Since the Cold War has ended, the Russian economy is in the hands of the mafia (sorry, the oligarchy) and is in the shitter for 90% of the population. A war, especially a bloodless one, would make Putin popular among the people again. It would create jobs in defense, and give the Russian people a sense of pride they haven't felt since half of the world was afraid of them around 20 years ago.

3) Putin needs to become more popular in order to maintain the facade of a Russian Democracy. We saw his desperation for popularity when he did the beefcake photos on his "fishing trip" a month ago. (Trying to make a Russian woman swoon? Show your abs and thick shoulders and wear army green in the middle of a cold stream.) If his popularity goes (further) downward, he must resort to scare tactics or bullying (kicking the representatives out again; calling a new election before it's time) to keep his position of power. He has one advantage in this climate: the army won't storm the castle, remove him by force and ship him to Siberia to drink Wodka and play cards until the guard comes in to end his misery with a lone bullet to the back of the head.

But really, this works to our advantage. If Russia aligns with Iran, then we will know our enemy better. We know from past experience how the Russians work, how they negotiate. If that influence rubs off on Iran, then all the better. Our problems in the Middle East mainly stem from not knowing our enemy and what lengths they will go to in order to secure victory. We know what Russia will do in order to look good. We've been making each other look good for a very long time...


-K

Off the Fence

Sorry to disappoint the one COG reader out there (thanks, Fun Guv!) but I'm falling off the fence into the "Not Running" side. I've put a lot of thought into it, and I want my first Half (or full) marathon to be done the right way. Training done properly; feel good about my effort; feel good about my results. If I attempt the 13.1 miles this Sunday, I won't do well. I certainly won't feel well. And I'll just feel discouraged from this running hobby of mine. I don't want to kill that passion, especially since right now the romance has cooled a bit and it is a chore for me to motivate. Fear not, faithful reader. I haven't given up. Running and I just don't play well together right now.

So the plan is to switch races to the wimpy little 5K and run it in a record time for me. I'm aiming for somewhere around 30 minutes. If I can't run the bigger race, I can at least do a personal best on the one I do run. Next year, I will run the Detroit Half-Marathon, and I will hopefully run it well. Anyone running Sunday...see you there!


-K

On the Fence (again)

Ok. I'm still trying to decide if I'm going to run the Detroit Half-Marathon on October 21. My training has been spotty all of September, and I don't have the distance logged yet either. This past Saturday I was absolutely OFF the fence into the "No" side after a horrible 8 miler done in 1:45:23. But then I read the online news about the Chicago Fun Run and I don't feel like such a douche. So now, back on the fence.

Here are my internal arguements:

1) FOR: It is the 30th anniversary of the race; it would be cool to run over the Ambassador Bridge; my time is good enough that I won't be forced on to the Sag Wagon; I want to have my first medal; I would like to say I did it.

2) AGAINST: I haven't trained properly; my pace is slow as a turtle; I won't enjoy it physically; my overall time will suck; I WILL have to walk some of it.

My deciding factor will be Saturday's 10 miler. The weather is no excuse, it will be cool and sunny that day. I will have a good idea of how my performance will be, and how I will handle a long distance. If I don't have a good run, I'm going to participate in the 5K instead and save it for next year when I have time to train the right way. Truly, I'm not leaning one way or the other at this point. Making the decision even harder, I didn't have to pay the normal entrance fee b/c my company is a major sponser. So I'm not even out the $60 if I switch races. Please dump your opinion in the comments section...

-K

Hair Run

I had the Hair Run again last night (see below for the definition of Hair Run). Because it is getting dark earlier now (damn Fall, damn You!), I'm leaving for my run as soon as I can get home from work. While Mr. Gravity cooks dinner, I'm running the neighborhood with my cherry-face and sweat glow.

Last night was a Super Hair Run. I'm running a little over 3 miles at a time during the week (two days a week), and saving the long run for the weekend. My 3 miles are run in the neighborhood, and my sub is a bunch of hills. In fact, the sub name has the word "Hill" in it. Truth in advertising, people. I'm hitting inclines of as much as 10% (in 2 spots). But, even so, my Hair Run was done in 34 minutes. I AM A GOLDEN GOD! (Bonus points for knowing what movie that comes from).

I felt GREAT, I felt STRONG. So I'm looking forward to trying 8 miles on Saturday morning, at least until I'm about halfway into the run. Wish me luck, dear reader...

And speaking of luck, Viel Gluck und Viel Spasse for those of you running Chicago this weekend! I'll be thinking of you!

-K