How Do I Quote Thee? Let me count the ways...

I've always wanted to be one of those people that could quote Shakespeare, or James Joyce, or passages from The Bell Jar. One of those smarty pants that could come up with the most appropriate quote from a high-brow source that just fit the occasion and made me look smart. Unfortunately, there are only really two sources of material that I dip in to for those quotations that cover life. The first is a wealth of quotes that apply in so many situations: The Simpsons.

My favorite Simpsons quote? It would be a toss up between Homer's "Alcohol. The cause and the solution to all of life's little problems" and Bart's "This both sucks and blows." The latter really applies at work.

But the source of the most quotes I can milk from? Why, The Princess Bride, of course!

"Inconceivable"

"My name is Diego Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

"Anybody got a peanut?"

"He's MOSTly dead."

"Tis a pity to waste a perfect pair of breasts such as yours."

"Sleep well, my friend, and dream of large women."

"Never engage in a land war in Asia."

"Humperdink, Humperdink, Humperdink."

"ROUS. Rodents Of Unusual Size"

"To the Pain"

"Hi pretty lady!"

I really could go on (and on). So this is the highest quote level I can achieve. Fortunately, my friends appreciate such a level, and they come in handy at parties. Keep warm, and put your favorite all time quote in the comments y'all.


-K

Farewell, cruel world!

I just wanted to post for the last time, fair reader. Soon enough, my arms will fall off; my back will seize; and my ass muscles will never recover. No, no. I've not had the best night of my life with Mr. COG (as he is on a business trip this week). You see, dear reader of COG, Mr. Cold Meiser shit about a foot of heavy wet snow all over my yard. And I've spent about 3 hours today shoveling the 75 foot driveway. By hand. By myself. Because the snowblower wouldn't toss that crap for anything.

Did I mention that I'm sick of winter? And oh, by the way, we're getting 3 more inches tomorrow? Sorry, 3 inches doesn't impress me as a measurement with ANYTHING. Especially snow and male genitalia. I think I'm changing my mind on New Year's resolutions: I resolve to reside in a warm climate.


-K